From the Bottom of My Heart

"Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction."

Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Today we celebrate the heart and all the love within it. With flowers and candy and romantic dinners we pay our respects to Saint Valentine, the third-century priest who was martyred on this day in 269 AD. Our hearts are amazing inventions. They miraculously keep us alive by sending blood through our bodies every second, every day.

But that’s not all they do.

Our hearts can both skip and leap with Olympic ability. They can melt too. Our hearts can be steadfast. They can break and sink. Hearts can be lost and left behind, even if they were in the right place all along. 

Our hearts feel. They see. In return, they can be touched. Out of the depths of them we speak. Something is memorized when we know it, not by mind, but by heart. We make promises by crossing our hearts. 

Hearts are like snowflakes, as no two are alike. There’s big hearts, golden hearts, and warm hearts. Some are youthful, even though they’ve lived for many years. Sadly, some are hardened and some are stone. Others are as cold as a polar vortex.

Like a telegraph, our hearts transmit information, often to console or encourage. Our hearts go out to others. They bleed for others. We share, bare, and pour out our hearts. We have heart-to-heart talks. Direct words come straight from the heart and it’s where we keep our best interests. We send heartfelt greetings and condolences. 

Hearts are paradoxes. There are heavy ones and light ones. In fear, our hearts knock and grow faint. But they also can be brave. In discouragement, they are sick. But a joyful heart is good medicine. If we lack effort, we didn’t have the heart. When we’ve worked hard, we used our whole heart. Our hearts can be set on something, but to get it, you might have to follow your heart. We mockingly tell others to eat their hearts out, but all women know that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. 

Without matters of the heart, there might be fewer songs on the radio. Juice Newton was playing with the Queen of Hearts and Elvis visited the Heartbreak Hotel. Bruce had a Hungry Heart. Bonnie Tyler’s heart was totally eclipsed. Singers are always telling us what to do with our hearts. Tom and Stevie commanded to stop dragging their hearts and Elton directed to don’t go breaking his heart. 

For a long time, I felt like I was, as the band Yes sang in the 80s, the owner of a lonely heart. But things changed last summer when I met someone who captured my heart. A mutual friend introduced us. A month later, the same friend hosted an essential oil class that I was teaching. Beautiful Karla attended. As the story goes, she purchased some oils so she’d be able to see me again. When I delivered the oils we sat and talked for an hour and a half. Besides having legs for days, I noticed her infectious laugh and a smile that would make Julia Roberts jealous. 

Then I went off to Mozambique. After I returned, she texted me:

“Do you like to hike?”

I thought maybe she was joking? Perhaps she’d stalked my Facebook page and noticed my hiking trips through Utah and Washington. I liked her approach.

“It’s only my favorite hobby,” I replied.

We opted for a walk on the beach and we’ve walking together ever since. We’ve walked in Santa Barbara and San Francisco. There have been trips to Paso Robles, Monterey, and Mammoth. And yes, we’ve hiked – from Palos Verdes, to the Palisades, to Pinnacles National Park. 

As much as I enjoy the trips and vacations, the walks around her neighborhood are just as special. It’s in those quiet strolls that our hearts connect. She says that I have a big heart. I don’t know about that, but she said she wants to take care of it. She realized that I needed security and stability. She saw in me passion and inspiration. We approach life differently, yet live in incredibly similar ways. She “thinks through her feelings, while I feel through my thoughts,” as another wise friend summarized. But somehow we arrive at the same destination. Perhaps because we have a parallel outward outlook on life.

All I know is we make a really good team. We don’t ever have a problem getting to the heart of the matter. She’s stolen my heart and I’ve vowed to risk a purple heart in order to protect hers.

Her heart is a fountain of virtues. She is calm, caring, poised, patience, and really smart. She’s elegant, diligent, noble, wise, and hardworking. She’s an amazing mom to a pair of wonderful kids. Her speech is pure. She thinks before she speaks and she’s super generous. She fears the Lord. She is faithful. And she’s weathered the storms of life.

“She is clothed with strength and dignity,

She can laugh at the days to come.”

She is beautiful. Inside and out. 

Lou Gehrig didn’t have a clue about luck. Because I feel like I’m the luckiest man alive. She makes me happy and I love her with all my heart. 

BK, Happy Valentine’s Day